IronOrchid wrote:will is innate
Yes, you have that right.
I reread the OP's comments, and as I think about it, I believe that single comment by IO has a lot to do with the OP's difficulty.
What I mean (and correct me if I'm wrong) is that I believe the OP (like many of us) struggles with the innate will actually getting in the way of obtaining our desired magical result. We all understand an important tenet of magic, that when you're done, forget it and do something else to get your mind off of it. To let the magic work by itself without your "help". When one can't seem to forget it, they wind up "trying to help" the magic along, subtly nudging it and prodding it, but that only winds up defeating your magical purpose instead of promoting it.
The problem is, sometimes you want something SO INCREDIBLY DESPERATELY that it seems almost impossible to get it out of your mind, and so mastery over your own will, especially your innate will is muy importante.
I think ultimately it boils down to faith. Faith and will are very closely related. Usually what you believe will happen (its gotta be on both conscious and subconscious levels, the latter more important than the former) will wind up happening, whether you want it that way or not. Your beliefs become your reality.
If a person really, truly has faith in their magic, it becomes much easier to "let go, and let God" (to borrow a cheesy axiom from modern fluffy bunny churchianity).
If your lack of faith causes you to struggle with trusting your own magical abilities, you will most likely attempt to "help" things along and defeat your own purpose.
So, I think it all comes down to faith.