Seavel wrote:What
Most people are born normal and confident, they don't have to work for it. And there are others, who are victims of fate!
Well my childhood sucked in a lot of ways, I was ill all the time and we were almost always poor, plus I was funny looking and very odd and reclusive, that's why I was so
cringingly underconfident into my teens, and then I thought "hang on a mo,
this sucks" and did something about it. I didn't see any reason to accept a fucked-up adulthood, after my less than exemplary childhood experiences as a sickly little weirdo. (Now I'm a healthy BIG weirdo, and sod
anyone who doesn't like that!
)
There's a world of personal development lit out there that testifies to the fact that LARGE numbers of people don't feel confident, and wish to change, but that won't happen as long as anyone (and I'm not saying you, I don't know you) wish to maintain that the world owes them anything for being a "victim." Maybe it does and maybe it doesn't, but self-pity corrodes
self-belief which is a vicious circle, so it has to be put into storage while some serious work gets done.
That saying "living well is the best revenge" is really true, whether it's revenge against childhood drawbacks or whatever - getting peace of mind and to a place where you can like yourself and reasonably feel confident other people will like you is the best way to honour your pain, whatever fate threw at you in the past - not placing your drawbacks on a pedestal like some hallowed trophy.
If you wanted to win a horse race, you'd first have to buy and train a racehorse: if you want to win the prizes in the competitions confident people win, you have to find a way to increase confidence until you're a match for anyone out there - and not sit pouting about how unfair life is.
NLP is a good way to start changing your self-perception, there's loads of books free in the library, stuff online, no-one's excluded, there are no excuses - just CHOICE.
I don't expect you to agree with me, but think about it - all our lives are the net result of choices we've made along the way, making different choices is possible, and becoming confident no matter what your drawbacks might be is acheivable, and we don't dishonour our pasts when we try to overcome them, instead we treat ourselves with the respect we deserve.
Magickally speaking you (if this is a problem for you) could start by asking for information you can inderstand on how to acquire confidence and get that feeling of power that shows you that you CAN make changes. It'll be worth it, believe me.
IOx